Friday, January 20, 2012

Why You Shouldn’t Do Daily Devo’s

bible studyAt the beginning of the year, I committed to doing the daily devotion guide that was handed out at our church around Christmas time.  There is a significant amount of reading each morning.  I found it tough to get up early and do it.  Yet as time has gone on I have found that I have settled into a rhythm.  It actually feels like the normal thing to do.

I am not a very patient person.  I wanted to feel like I was getting a message from God every morning.  I wanted to understand something new and be able to quote something I learned on my blog.  I wanted to ponder God’s word and feel wiser.  That hasn’t happened.

Here is what I have noticed.  I have this increasing awareness of my flaws and my broken state.  I can’t link this to a specific scripture I have read.  I just know that I am hyper-aware of all of the sin, failings, and empty places.  I am aware of the dreams I had and have somehow abandoned.  I am aware of the woman I said I wanted to be but I am not.  It really sucks.

I am kidding (sort of) when I say you shouldn’t do daily devo’s.  I know that this is a time of growth for me.  I am not completely miserable.  I don’t hate myself.  I am just aware.  I know that this awareness will turn into fruit eventually. 

Sunday, January 08, 2012

If God Were Walking Beside Me

This week has been really hard.  Getting up early every morning to do devotions is not easy.  Add to that, I joined a challenge to work out 2012 minutes this month which is just over an hour a day.  So getting up early and working out more has made me very tired.  The devotions haven’t been immediately fulfilling.  I thought I would have a take away every day or at least most days.  That hasn’t happened for me.

I am hoping that the devotional discipline will be like working out.  When I first started working out it was awkward and unnatural.  I kept on because I had been given a program to follow. Eventually working out became more natural and I feel like something is missing when I don’t do it. I don’t always enjoy exercise, but I know it is something I need to do. In this case I am also following a reading plan.  I am pondering the devotional thought each day along with many others from my church community.  My hope is that it will become as engrained in me as exercise has.

One day the devotional thought was ‘what would you do if you God were walking beside you?’  Yes I know ‘God is with me’ but actually physically there?  I don’t know.  The question is overwhelming.  That said it is a question I want to ponder and live by.  Seems almost better than the good old ‘What would Jesus do?’