Saturday, April 21, 2012

Enough of Too Much

too many emailsThis morning I woke up and decided I have had enough.  I am sick of feeling yucky all of the time.  I want to feel better and I know that in order to do that, I need to start making healthier food choices.  I knew this day would come.

A few weeks ago I started exercising.  This is generally a first step for me.  Now this morning I decided to face the scale.  I have gained weight -- a lot of weight.  So enough.  It is time to start making better choices and tracking my food again.  Today I started tracking again.  It feels good.

Interestingly, I also decided I was sick of getting so many emails from the various companies I have given my email address to for whatever reason.  I unsubscribed from at least ten lists.  Then I cleaned my apartment (okay that’s probably because I have people coming over tomorrow.)  I feel like I can breathe all of a sudden.  Like I have more space.  I used to get about 20 emails a day.  Today I got two and unsubscribed from their lists too.

Getting rid of clutter seems symbolic of what I am doing today.  I am not going to beat myself up.  That would just add to the clutter.  I am going to give myself room to focus on things that matter.

Friday, April 06, 2012

Some Stories Deserve A Pause

cocubine-door-pic2I am behind on my devotions this week.  I decided to catch up this morning.  I read Judges 19 and I had to stop.  What just happened?  I spent a few minutes looking for bible commentaries that would help me understand the passage better.  For several more minutes I have just been sitting here trying to absorb the story.

Here is my version:  man has a fight with his wife, she takes off for several months, man decides that he still loves her and goes after her, they decide to reconcile, hang out at the in-laws for a few days, they go off and get stuck in a bad city, stay at some guys house where they are threatened by some locals, man panics and throws his wife out to the locals, they rape her all night, she crawls back to the door where the man is staying, he opens the door and discovers she has died, he cuts her up into twelve pieces and sends her out to the tribes of Israel saying no worse crime has ever been committed.

What a sad and difficult story.  In my research I determined that some translations say that she cheated on him.  I agree with the commentaries that say it is unlikely given the culture.  He would have just had her stoned.  Yet I think that is part of what makes me sad.  Did that make it easier for the translators to accept that this man just threw her to the wolves?  Did calling her a concubine as opposed to a wife make it better? I imagine the agony of the woman and it fills me with grief.  At the same time I am angry with the husband.  What does the man have to complain about when he threw her out there?  And who cuts up their wife into 12 pieces?

The raw yucky-ness of this story makes me think of the cross.  For me, the fate of the concubine is on of the most horrible things I can think about.  Just like the cross.

Monday, April 02, 2012

The Process of Blogging

Last night I had the opportunity to meet with some people who blog, want to blog, read blogs, basically all about the art of blogging.  I lamented on how I didn’t have things that I could share publically.  Either they are not suitable for public viewing or I don’t have enough perspective to blog about them.  A good friend reminded me that there is always something I CAN share. 

I realized that in the past when I had an assignment or a deadline, I would notice things and I would write about them.  I miss that.  I miss noticing things.

I can’t commit to blogging every day.  I can commit to noticing.  So I am going to experiment with trying to notice something every day.  Who knows what I will come up with.