Anxious
Last week was challenging for me. No there was not a crisis at work. I wasn’t even extremely busy. It was just a bunch of little things that challenged my feeling of peace. I have been feeling overwhelmed by life lately. I don’t know why.
After I had surgery I remember thinking that the little stuff would never get to me again. For weeks I had that perspective. I let the little stuff go. However it was also a struggle sometimes because most things didn’t seem to matter. It was difficult to re-engage work when you have the perspective that only life-threatening events really matter.
I have found myself back into work. I think I am taking a balanced perspective. I have found it a lot less frustrating lately. I have let go of a lot. I have a great week at the end of June. I remembered why I enjoy my job. I felt like I had contributed something meaningful.
Last weekend I posted about feeling distant from God. I tried to spend time in prayer but I couldn’t really settle down enough to feel connected. So I read the Bible. I read for quite a while but I settled on Psalm 91. I have been trying to read the first part of it out loud before I go to sleep:
1 Those who live in the shelter of the Most High
will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
2 This I declare of the Lord:
He alone is my refuge, my place of safety;
he is my God, and I am trusting him.
3 For he will rescue you from every trap
and protect you from the fatal plague.
4 He will shield you with his wings.
He will shelter you with his feathers.
His faithful promises are your armor and protection.
5 Do not be afraid of the terrors of the night,
nor fear the dangers of the day,
6 nor dread the plague that stalks in darkness,
nor the disaster that strikes at midday.
After I had surgery I remember thinking that the little stuff would never get to me again. For weeks I had that perspective. I let the little stuff go. However it was also a struggle sometimes because most things didn’t seem to matter. It was difficult to re-engage work when you have the perspective that only life-threatening events really matter.
I have found myself back into work. I think I am taking a balanced perspective. I have found it a lot less frustrating lately. I have let go of a lot. I have a great week at the end of June. I remembered why I enjoy my job. I felt like I had contributed something meaningful.
Last weekend I posted about feeling distant from God. I tried to spend time in prayer but I couldn’t really settle down enough to feel connected. So I read the Bible. I read for quite a while but I settled on Psalm 91. I have been trying to read the first part of it out loud before I go to sleep:
1 Those who live in the shelter of the Most High
will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
2 This I declare of the Lord:
He alone is my refuge, my place of safety;
he is my God, and I am trusting him.
3 For he will rescue you from every trap
and protect you from the fatal plague.
4 He will shield you with his wings.
He will shelter you with his feathers.
His faithful promises are your armor and protection.
5 Do not be afraid of the terrors of the night,
nor fear the dangers of the day,
6 nor dread the plague that stalks in darkness,
nor the disaster that strikes at midday.
Comments
I think it's so powerful when we speak bible verses out loud.
Recently, I've been trying to memorize scripture. I bought myself dry erase markers & write out the verses on my bedroom mirror. That way, they're in my face & I can keep referring to them. Eventually they sink in.
I'm praying for you to feel more grounded in God's strength & love.