What I heard was that he characterized his vision for Soul Sanctuary as being real. I had to stop. Most people would probably say that I had that down pat… I mean I post honest and authentic articles to my blog. I am approachable and easy to talk to. I don’t pretend to be okay when I’m not. Still I sense a challenge in that.
To be honest about being honest… I am selective about what I share. Sometimes that is because it is not wise to post some details to the internet. However, more often that not it is because I don’t want to talk about something or admit something. There is often a long lag in posting to my blog because I don’t want to post until I have come out of something. Maybe that’s okay but I also tend to distance myself from others when I feel that way too.
Even when I do finally share I noticed that I tended to smooth out the rough edges. Instead of talking about sin I talked about darkness. I talked about making bad choices to deal with my pain. I never admitted that I made a series of choices. I never admitted when I was going through it that I was being tempted.
Even beyond the honesty in being real, I sense a greater challenge. Being real is also about being authentic. There was a list of questions in the teaching. Are you praying, are you reading scripture, are you worshipping, are you giving, are you in community? I have to say that I have not been doing all of those things consistently.
In the fall I had a vision of a group of people who would strive to be disciples together. They would pray together, they would lift each other up. They would confess sin. They would have words for each other. They would be reaching out to others outside of the group. That is my prayer for Soul Sanctuary. My prayer for myself is that God would use me somehow to make that happen.